Personality Cafe Reviews 4

Please avoid Personality Cafe like the plague. Its site administrator and moderators there are allowing abuse. People get banned and cyberbullied like crazy on there instead of being treated with respect.

I was a member from 2014 to 2020. The site was and still is full of people with mental disorders, and being exposed to it was harmful to my well-being.
Personality Cafe is supposed to be a therapeutic website, but there is no clear distinction between people offering help and people who need it. I don't recall ever getting a piece of advice which would be really helpful.

I was harassed/verbally abused publicly by a user who claimed multiple mental illnesses, and when I expressed concern, the mods temp-banned me to "gain perspective," even though I hadn't violated any forum rule. They permitted her to continue to post about me and threaten me on her blog, with no repercussions. (She was jealous because a man she liked had been talking to me.) Her threat implied she might murder or dox me. Mods claimed she was harmless, even though threats are obviously a violation of forum rules. Who are they to determine a threat is harmless? Once the threat is proven not harmless, it's too late.

Then another user claiming to be a man insulted me publicly and made personal attacks in violation of forum rules, but the mods sided with him, and banned me for 3 months for "drama," even though I was trying to break out of an emotionally abusive DM relationship with him (one of the mods knew this history) and had not violated any rule.

When I filed a ban appeal, some of the conversation between the mod and the person who attacked me were hidden, and one post was apparently deleted altogether, based on the post count. I then emailed VerticalScope, the company that owns PerC, and they claimed they never received my appeal, even though I had seen a confirmation screen. I sent them screenshots of abusive emails and posts, but they claimed I was "aggressive," even though I had always been careful to be polite and the other person routinely spoke in a demeaning manner towards other users with no repercussions. This sexist double standard of calling women "aggressive" while a man gets away with more egregious behavior is well-studied and documented in society.

Although they denied my ban appeal, it seems they did hide the blog where the other woman was threatening me, which means they know what she was doing was wrong. They also began hiding the ruder posts of the abusive man so they don't show up in search results. Yet one of the mods continued liking his posts and asking for his advice.

This abusive man provoked another woman publicly on the forum, and when she disagreed with him, another man jumped in and called her an "elitist t-at" [slur for female genitalia], and one of the mods actually liked that post. The woman asked the mod to treat her with respect, but the mod did not de-escalate, and eventually another mod thread banned her.

During my ban, I called/texted/emailed with a woman from the forum. Eventually, I came to realize that THIS FEMALE "FRIEND" WAS THE "MAN" WHO ABUSED ME, AS WELL AS THE WOMAN WHO THREATENED ME WITH MURDER. I also realized (even though I can't know for sure) that she had DMed me or spoken to me on threads as SEVERAL DIFFERENT USERS, including many of the most frequent posters. Of course, I can't prove this 100%, as I don't have access to all the evidence, so I'm making it clear this is only my best understanding of what happened. One creepy thing is that I noticed a former mod who used to post every day about her active imagination, substance abuse, and problems seems suddenly silent, and I don't know if it's related (e.g., if she defended me, or was my abuser). Whoever it was, she used this 360-degree information to gaslight and manipulate me. Although I wanted to talk anonymously, she kept trying to get my real number and identity.

Why would mods ban me when I hadn't violated any rules? Why would the company not rectify abuse and instead cover up evidence? You can use common sense to come up with some possible motivations that would cause varying degrees of discomfort.

In the past, I would go on the forum to ask for advice and then leave, but this time, I stayed on to try to help other people and find a community. Instead, I was emotionally manipulated and gaslighted, verbally abused, lost sleep, neglected myself, and got behind at work. Some days I was yelled at in DM for 9 hours by one of the profiles, in a way that suggested they would have hurt me physically if we had been in the same room. Despite my emotional resilience, I did suffer quite a bit. It was a scary place for me.

I need this to be public information, to protect myself. Since it is a personality forum, there is a LOT of information I posted about myself before I realized how dangerous it was. Some of the people on the forum appear to have personality disorders that can result in abusive behavior.

Although I had my Android browser on Do Not Track and delete cookies/PWs upon exit, strangely I would still be logged in when I re-opened my browser unless I logged out. Also had ghost touch typing, then my phone was hacked (via XRecorder?), even if I can't prove it's related. MY IDENTITY, PERSONAL DETAILS, AND FINANCIAL INFO WERE BREACHED--per the original threat?

I plan to report this to US and Canada cyber crime and anti-fraud units.

no wonder not a lot of ppl are on this site. its site managers ban ppl like egotistic cowards behind a screen. so i wouldnt recommend ppl going to this toxic place. there were better forums where i was treated with respect. but i was disrespectfully banned from personality cafe. good riddance. at least there are other forums where i can talk to genuinely reasonable site managers